Do you give yourself enough credit as a mother? Or, like almost all moms out there, do you never feel that you are doing enough, doing the right thing or even just being a good mom in general?
I think this is something most moms really struggle with.
We live in a society today where you are condemned if you go to work outside the home and leave your kids in daycare. Or, you are criticized if you decide to stay home with the kids and give up working outside the home….
Everyone has an opinion, and they feel that they are completely free to share it with everyone. And no matter what we do, there are those who will find it necessary to point out how wrong we are for doing things the way we are.
The saddest thing is that it isn’t even society as a whole that is the hardest on us moms. It is ourselves who are the most damaging to each other.
It seems that every mom always feels they are doing things the right way, and that their opinions and ideas for raising their kids is the best way – and anyone who does their parenting any differently, is certain to end up with dysfunctional kids who will never grow up to contribute anything to society.
The end result usually has all moms feeling that they aren’t doing anything right!
The thing is – you are most likely going to raise your children in a very similar way to how you were raised. You will pass on the values you were taught, and try to do the absolute best you can for your kids.
But some days it just never feels like it’s enough. Or that what you are doing is right. You can start to second guess decisions you make, or parenting styles you have, simply from hearing a comment from a mom who is doing things a little bit different.
Why do we do this to ourselves and to each other?
We are all in this together. We are all moms, and we are all doing the best we can. Some days we will mess up – and some of the decisions we make now might not be the right ones.
But, as long as we are all doing everything we can to keep our kids healthy, happy and growing up to be good people, there really is no right or wrong way.
We need to start supporting each other, and encouraging. Because I don’t care how good of a mom you think you are, or how much better you think your way of raising kids is – the truth is, we will all have those days when our kids shout from the rooftops that they hate us and we are ruining their lives!
Wouldn’t it be nice to have the support of each other for those days? Or, for the days that seem like everything you are doing is wrong. Or not enough.
Our confidence as mothers would soar, and who knows! Maybe we would all end up feeling like just maybe…..we are really good moms!
Marie Pugh is a stay at home mom to 2 girls, who writes about every day life of an ordinary mom in a “supermom” world on her blog http://supermomchallenged.com
4 Comments
Nicely said Jenna! Yes, i would love to bond with other Moms. People are funny. You say you are doing on thing, and suddenly, they are offended, or feeling like you are condemning them. Or, their way is the right away and there is no other way.
I mean, breast feeding, baby wearing, BLW, cloth diapering, gentle parenting, spanking, religion…etc. etc. etc. and so forth. Those are just a few areas where – I just don’t talk about to people much. You tell someone you are breastfeeding or struggling with it, and they are formula feeding- suddenly, you never hear from them again.
I wish we could just form a group of like minded moms – ones who are interested in raising good kids within a crazy society. No competition.
Thanks Lisa, this awesome article is actually from Marie at http://supermomchallenged.com/ and she made some amazing points that I think all of us as Moms can learn from!
Great post! You are very right about everyone has an opinion. I don’t really care what their opinion is. 🙂 I am trying to teach my kids to be responsible members of their community. I wish more people would be supportive of each other. I want to be a parent to my kids, not their friend. I think that is where a lot of parents make a mistake. We all just do the best we can.