Self Doubt, Your Worst Nightmare

Being a single parent sucks. Being a person with chronic health issues sucks. Being a parent with health problems sucks. Combine being a single parent with being a parent with chronic health issues and it’s quickly one of a parent’s worst nightmares.

We all want what is best for our children and for them to have everything. The thing about having chronic health issues AND being a single parent is, you doubt yourself ALOT. Am I doing enough? Am I not keeping up? How would things be different if I was “Normal”. Three times in the past 48 hours, I have been told by different people that my children are amazing and that I am raising beautiful, smart, caring children and that I do an incredible job. It is words I needed to hear in one of those moments where you are pulling your hair out. You might not recognize your accomplishments until someone makes you think about such.

While I am confident on the outside, you’d be surprise to know I’m very introverted and self-conscious, self-critical. It SUCKS. When I got hit with my chronic migraines and mysofacial pain, I was TWO semesters away from a Criminology degree. I even tried going back to school for a different degree. I couldn’t do it. Even though I’m well aware of my health circumstances and that with the Yo-Yo Effect you can have fighting such, my attendance for work would just flat out stink and not be appropriate for someone needing to rely on me.

When you get sick, you constantly question if you should be trying to do more (although most I know will tell you that you do MORE than you should). It really is a never ending battle. The saying that we are own worst enemies. The amount of self-criticism can be drowning. 

Life is hard enough. We all have obstacles, we all have worry, regret, lots of what-ifs. When it comes down to it, you can either let it tear you down or you can say enough is enough. You ARE GOOD ENOUGH. Stop tearing yourself apart. When you are feeling down, take the moment to write down five things you are amazing at and accomplishments you are proud of.

Don’t Give Up. You are amazing.